Ho! Ho! Ho! And A Barrel Of Runs!
By Editorial Staff
With apologies to Robert Louis Stevenson and Treasure Island, I really hope that Santa brings the Braves “Ho! Ho! Ho! And A Barrel Of Runs” this Christmas. And while he’s at it, maybe he will bring the rest of the division a “Ho! Ho! Ho! and a Bottle Of Tums”!
Having said all that, I don’t think it’s fair to leave all the work up to Santa, especially with him being as busy as he is this time of year (you know, granting Brewers’ fans wishes and everything!).
I figure there have to be some stocking stuffers that can help Santa make this dream of mine come true.
I’m going to take a crack at starting the list; maybe you folks out there can help me fill it in. Here goes!
- A pair of genuine “hitting glasses” for Nate McLouth, as he hasn’t been able to hit anymore ever since he’s been able to see the ball coming at him! (made with care by the “X-Ray Specs” people)
- Extra large bottles of Geritol for Chipper for obvious reasons
- For less obvious reasons, copies of all the Star Trek movies for Chipper, as he’s trying to boldly go where no 39 year old third baseman has gone before (which is “on to a productive season”)
- A guide to sushi bars in Jackson, MS for Kenshin Kawakami.
- If the blank page Kawakami received above doesn’t work, hopefully he’ll get a series of wake-up calls shortly thereafter (or a copy of the board game “Clue”!)
- Copies of “Top Gun” for Heyward and Freeman, now that the ace and his wing-man are about to be reunited!
- A copy of “Accounting For Dummies” for Frank Wren, so that maybe his budget numbers will start agreeing with everyone else’s
- A choice of a first aid kit or rabbit’s foot for Philly’s starting rotation, ’cause you can’t be hurt if you’re gonna hurl, but the fans will sure hurl all over them if they can’t hurl as expected!
- A guide to “Life After The Bomb” for Sandy Alderson, as it looks like they may have to blow the whole thing up in NY and finally
- Happy Holidays to all our readers from Tomahawk Take and the whole FanSided Network!
Now, I’d really like to hear some of your gift ideas